got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize