She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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