and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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