he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
