bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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