I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
