We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Randomize
