I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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