Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
