4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
