So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
