The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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