hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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