Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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