ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
