yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
