i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
