ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
