Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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