if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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