I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
