Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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