I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
should my penis look like a turkey
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
