if i died would you start the facebook group?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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