My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
