Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
