guys are not supposed to queef...right?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
