GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize