Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize