I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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