just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Randomize
