i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I could fuck to npr.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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