i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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