I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
jump out the window naked night went bad
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
