I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
