I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
My Sexting was not on an AP level
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Randomize
