a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
