did you get engaged???
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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