At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
My vagina is officially offended.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
is it fun? or sober?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize