She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
BRING THE BAGELS
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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