Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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