yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
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