i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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