? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
