I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize