So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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