at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
