TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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