clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
