Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
