? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
