let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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