I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
